3 Nephi 12:21-24
Ye have heard that it hath been said by them of old time, and it is also written before you, that thou shalt not kill, and whosoever shall kill shall be in danger of the judgment of God; but I say unto you, that whosoever is angry with his brother shall be in danger of his judgment. And whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council; and whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire. Therefore, if ye shall come unto me, or shall desire to come unto me, and rememberest that thy brother hath aught against thee—go thy way unto thy brother, and first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come unto me with full purpose of heart, and I will receive you.
For some, who have yet to receive the baptism of fire, this might be the one thing holding you back. Put the Lord to the test and see if he doesn’t receive you when you do exactly this.
My disciples, in days of old, sought occasion against one another and forgave not one another in their hearts; and for this evil they were afflicted and sorely chastened. Wherefore, I say unto you, that ye ought to forgive one another; for he that forgiveth not his brother his trespasses standeth condemned before the Lord; for there remaineth in him the greater sin. I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men.
This gives one a thing to check on if one is being afflicted and sorely chastened. This passage also implies, logically, that in the end, the only real sin is not forgiving others of all their trespasses. That, in turn, leads one to the conclusion that it is lack of forgiveness that characterizes those who are cast out.
I knew a man, upward of 10 years ago, who was cast out of his home by his soon-to-be-ex-wife. He felt betrayed by her; a burning coal of pain was placed in his heart and he had no relief from it. She owed him! And he obsessed about it for a couple of weeks, until it occurred to him that given the way he felt about her, they could not both be exalted, for the exalted dwell in unity and harmony, mutually indwelling, knowing all there is to know about each other. It would be intolerable to exist in that unity with those who bear the pains of betrayal in their hearts towards them. Moreover, even if she would admit her fault in the matter, she would not change her course, and she could not make him whole. There was therefore no purpose served by holding on to her debts, so he freely forgave her of all her debts to him, both temporal and spiritual. Maybe someday they could be friends again, and maybe in the next world they could dwell happily in each others’ presence. If it were not to be so, at least it would not be because of him. And because he did that, the glowing ember of pain was taken from his heart, and the Lord invited him to see what Joseph saw.
This doesn’t mean that man gets along with his ex.
May we all forgive all.